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"Superissimo is the Grand King of the Racing Serious Biciclette. Donut try for stopping us, no. It will smasha you."

Bonus Hour Cycling Club

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There’s but one day a year when you get a free hour. We shift our clocks, but something more magical than that, something more marketable happens. Two men of sub-phenomenal fitness levels have consumed pressed pots of sacred oily beans, dressed themselves in copious layers of status-indicating wicking fibres, and met at an hour grand. The Bonus Hour. Thanks to the genius of western world timekeeping magic, this two hour journey may only register on a STRAVA-type social exercise network as one hour, therefore we get to shatter every record. It’s like a secret tunnel in Marioland, but sufferer. An occasion so exclusive of course warranted branding and a smartly conjured roundel. I cannot tell you too much, or at least not without asking you to first visit our web café boutique to prove your commitment to our vague but attractive purpose.
Now, absorb the gritty imagery of this prouesse, and may giddiness accompany your anticipation of each coming caption.

dale_sleepy
The blinds just so, approachers can see that Mexican Dale’s bike style is niche. Of course.
Provisions were scared into the safety of jersey pockets by the formidable villain, Monsieur Tofu.
Provisions were scared into the safety of jersey pockets by the formidable villain, Tofu Toy Man Thing.
If you donut have hot dog+computer sponsorre, you are not really racing.
If you donut have hot dog+computer sponsorre, you are not really racing.
There is no caption. Just absorb Superissimo style fashion now. And now, too. Now.
There is no caption. Just absorb Superissimo style fashion now. And now, too. Now.
5 years ago this would look so foolish. But now it is money-time. Gravel©, merci.
5 years ago this would look so foolish, but now it is money-time. The exploits of Fortunate Men™ are nothing now without Gravel©, merci.
Ew, no. Not dirt, okay? Ew.
Ew, no. I said Gravel©, not dirt, okay? This is shitty joke.
Gratuitous WTFKITS shout. Macho all-times.
Gratuitous WTFKITS shout. Deserving of 2 roundels, see? Macho all-times.
Thank you, this helps. 15 year Laphroig wins over dirt. Maybe because of how the taste is the same. I should have brought Rosé.
Thank you, this helps. 15 year Laphroig wins over dirt. Maybe because of how the taste is the same. I should have brought Rosé.
I donut come here to be a man. I come here to look nice and make my cheque from Superissimo.
I donut come here to be a man. I come here to look nice and make my cheque from Superissimo.
dale_so_shining
Okay, maybe the Dirtwasser was not too bad because now look at how Mexican Dale is SO SHINING!
See, now that is fast.
See, now that is fast.  Au revoire-Ciao. Until Next Time™.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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